5 eggs, An Anniversary and a Give-Away

A few weeks ago God used another one of His people to encourage me. A sweet friend, Meade, and her two precious girls brought me by a little "happy." She is actually a sorority sister of mine (although I am a few years older) and the wife of a fraternity brother of Drew's. She and her husband, Cale, have been one of many couples that have faithfully prayed for us, supported us and encouraged us since Brock's death. They are precious to us. She gave me a beautiful necklace. When I opened it in front of her, I was almost speechless. I was able to hold it together until she left. I then went to my room, sat down in my chair and just cried. I did not cry because her gift made me sad; I cried because once again, God encouraged me in the perfect way at the perfect time. At the time, I found myself in some intense grief over Brock. I was missing him so desperately. The reality of the new baby had also hit. I found myself in such a strange place of being sad over Brock's life that seemed to leave our family too soon, yet wanting to be joyful over this little life that is about to join our family very soon.

As I pulled the necklace out of the bag, Meade pointed out to me that it had five eggs in the nest to represent my five children. The necklace was beautiful. I adored it immediately. It is so delicately hand crafted by Jenny. But, what I loved even more, was the thought that there was an egg for each of my children. This was really the first acknowledgment by someone, other than us and my obstetrician, of us having 5 children. Sitting in my chair moments later, God reminded me that yes I do have 5 children by His blessing. This seemed to be exactly what my heart needed to hear.

I often have a hard time describing my feelings of deep grief. As I lay it at Jesus' feet, I trust that the Holy Spirit interprets my motherly groans just as He promised in Romans 8:26 - In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. Sometimes I never do get the right words to put with the emotions, but I know when He brings me peace to the situation. He reminded me of the Hope of seeing Brock again and that just because he was no longer seen (or heard) here, he was still mine. With the addition of this new baby, I would have 5 children, not 4 again. He showed me that each one of the freshwater pearls is unique and precious in its on way; so are my children. God's plan for each one of them also is different, and I will love them in different ways. My love for Brock will continue and it will not be threatened by my love for this new baby. The birth of this new baby will bring us joy, not pain.

A year ago this week, I started this blog. It felt so...unlike me. I still struggle with fears before I post any entry. God has blessed me in so many ways through this "strange" outlet as I step out and trust Him each time. So many of you encourage me greatly through your comments, whether you post on the blog, send me an email, or just tell me when you see me. God uses you more than you'll ever know!

So...to celebrate my blogaversary (with a word I made up), I am having a give-away. Jenny of jennypickle designs has generously agreed to donate a "Mother's necklace" to one of the readers of my blog. She is also a mother who has lost a child and is greatly honored to do this. She will custom make it just for you with the number of eggs you want in your nest.

So I will open the comments up to this give-away. I know many of you have told me you don't know how to comment. Just click on the word "comments" at the end of the post. If you have a gmail account, you can use that. If you have a blogger account you can use that. If not just comment as anonymous and then be sure to sign your name. The code they ask you to verify is just so Blogger can make sure that you are real and not some computer spam.

When you comment, I thought it would be fun to have everyone answer the question of, "How many eggs would be in your nest?" I realize not everyone of you are moms. If you don't have children, you could answer how many children were in your family growing up. I also realize that some of you are waiting desperately for God to bless you with a child; please know that I have already prayed for you. You might include one precious egg in your nest as an acknowledgment of the desire you have and the hope you have for the Lord's timing in your life.

So let the fun begin. I will put the names in a hat and let the boys draw one for me this Thursday night after 9pm, eastern time. If you don't win, be sure to still check out Jenny's store anyway...AND drop a hint for those buying you a Christmas present or buy one yourself for a special mom that you know.